Virginia Parsons, http://hangoutmarketingu.com interviewx Linda Kroll about Compassionate Mediation for Enhanced Relationships. “Would you like to experience more peace, love and joy in the world? My very special guest, Linda Kroll, is recognized as an expert in psychotherapy, mediation, and spiritual counseling. Through awareness, higher consciousness, and empathy, Linda believes we can make the world a safer place from which to heal and transform our most intimate relationships. Her primary philosophy is “Love is the answer, but it starts with loving your SELF.”
We will explore the following hot topics: 1) “Know Thyself” …and your Parts (Guided Meditation) 2) Tips to deepen Connections and have more Fun 3) What is Compassionate Mediation® Linda Kroll is a lawyer, Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC). a Certified Mediator and a Chopra Certified Master Teacher
Her trademarked systems of Compassionate Mediation® and SELF-Led Divorce® have helped thousands of couples who were at a crossroads in their relationships. They have been able to heal and transform their relationships from their highest and best SELF.
In February, 2016, Linda’s book — Compassionate Mediation® for Relationships at a Crossroads: Add Passion to Your Marriage or Compassion to Your Divorce — became an instant Amazon International Best Seller. You can get a copy of the book HERE
Relationships can often be stressful. Happiness is often a choice, and it depends on what we choose to think about any situation.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we can choose happiness no matter what is going on around us?
I was thinking it could be as easy as ABC – the ABC’s of Happiness — acceptance, balance, and compassion.
A is for ACCEPTANCE
So take a deep breath and think about what it means to be accepting.
Sometimes that’s harder to do than we think.
The Serenity Prayer says “help me to accept the things I cannot change and the wisdom to know the difference.” There’s a lot we cannot change. There’s a lot we cannot change about the people we love. So part of our opportunity in our relationships is to ACCEPT our partners, and quit trying to change them.
Sometimes you may choose to put up boundaries, or even to leave the relationship, but you can do so with acceptance. You can practice non-judgment — just a calm witnessing presence of “this is what it is and they are who they are. I can choose to engage or not, but I don’t have to worry about how to change them.”
As Al-Anon says in Step One, we’re powerless to change anyone else.
The only the person you can change is yourself.
So take another deep breath and choose what you will accept right now – and spare yourself hours of stress!
B is for BALANCE
The B of happiness and happy relationships is balance, and that’s also a challenge at times because there’s a lot of things we can balance.
I think if we start to balance in our needs, as well as taking care of the needs of others — — we’re going feel much more open and willing to participate and share if we balanced our needs in there.
Balance your needs at the top of your list. Put your meditation, your yoga, your walk, your communing with nature first. Then you’ll have so much more to share.
Now I’m getting to my favorite bridge, it reminds me of relationships. Sometimes you have to meet in the middle,
it’s not a straight line to have a healthy relationship. You have to learn how to put your needs out there and then accommodate the needs of someone else.
Balance in a way where you both hold onto your individuality. You both hold onto the essence of who you are at your core. You find someone who can appreciate you and celebrate you, and help you incorporate more of that truthful, soulful living into your life.
C is for COMPASSION
The ABCs, acceptance, balance, and compassion. Deep breath.
Start with being compassionate with yourself.
I’m sure if you’re like most of us you have much more compassion for others than you do yourself. So take a moment and have compassion for everything that you’re feeling and have compassion for everything you’re not allowing yourself to feel. All the exiled sadness and fears or hurt or anger, just have compassion.
When you have compassion those feelings soften, those feelings can move through you, and those feelings allow you to be more present.
So have compassion for yourself first, and then you’ll have more space to be compassionate with the people around you.
If there’s something that’s challenging you right now, or something that’s bothering you, something that’s stressing you out — just see which of the ABCs will help you right now. Acceptance, Balance, and Compassion.
Choose even one thought of one of these, and you’ll immediately feel better.
You can also join me in my online video program to help you create the relationship you truly desire and deserve. You can learn more HERE.
About Linda
You can heal and transform all your relationships with Compassionate Communication and Compassionate Mediation®.
Love is always the answer – and it starts with loving your SELF. Learn how to add more peace, love and joy to your life as you practice exquisite SELF care.
Linda is the author of the bestselling “Compassionate Mediation® for Relationships at a Crossroads: Add Passion to Your Marriage or Compassion to Your Divorce “ —for a free chapter, go to http://www.lindakrollbook.com/
Linda is also author of the he Kindle book “Compassionate Divorce -Changing the Face of Divorce, One Heart at a Time.” https://amzn.to/2Nvj1v2
Founder of Compassionate Communication Academy. Linda believes, “Families need not be “broken,” but can be peacefully and respectfully “re-structured.”
Compassionate Communication Creates New Beginnings when You’re Thinking of Divorce.
The night before I was to be in court to finalize my divorce after a very long separation, I was moved to convert my sadness, hurt and anger into hope for a new beginning. If your marriage has difficulties, or you’re thinking of divorce, I want to share with you how I did that for myself.
I wrote a prayer.
When I arrived at the courtroom, I gave a copy to my formerly beloved (and soon to be ex) husband and to his attorney. I hoped to end our marriage in a way that would set the tone for a peaceful and respectful co-creation of our future restructured family.
I wanted us to always be able to Compassionately Communicate –to connect our highest and best SELF, let go of all the limiting (and judgmental) beliefs we held, unburdened pain from the past, and relate from our hearts.
I hoped we could protect our children from the shrapnel of any more animosity or conflict.
I offered it as my prayer, and for some, it can be an intention. It was my heartfelt request for a future of respectful co-parenting, genuine friendship and Compassionate Communication.
I hope others can set the same intention or recite the same prayer.
“Love is the answer – and it starts with loving your SELF.” Linda Kroll
Linda’s Settlement Prayer
I pray for a peaceful and respectful settlement meeting, in which all parties come together from their Highest Selves and their truest connection to Your guidance, wisdom and love.
I pray that the parts of ourselves that are angry, fearful, defensive, revengeful, retributive, punitive, unloving, unforgiving, sad, young, abandoned, resentful, negative, hurting and hurtful – that all these parts be quelled with the leadership of the Self, coming from a place of trust in Your presence and light.
I pray for compassion, forgiveness, gratitude and appreciation. Although our marriage has come down to a business closing of money and asset division, I ask that we remember the love that brought us together, and the wonderful children, which our union has borne. For their sakes as well as our own, we wish to put an end to this process in as respectful and loving a way as possible.
Although we each carry our sadness and pain and mutual regrets, I pray that we can look beyond this difficult period to a time when we can be friends and coexist peacefully. I pray that our once intact family can be rearranged to two intact and loving homes, where our children feel connected and comfortable. I pray that we can hold in a different light the love that once joined us forever; that on the deepest level we wish each other well as we let go and let G-d direct our lives.
For the sake of all we once had, and for all we had planned to share together, let us now finalize the terms of our marital dissolution so that we are both free to get on with our lives.
Let us complete this last painful task with a sense of trust in the love we once shared and hopefully can remember after this part is over. Let us not work from purely simple and self-serving motives, but keep in mind the general welfare of each of us, and our children. Let us request our attorneys to contribute what is needed for the mutual benefit of all concerned.
In the end, let us know that we behaved civilly, that we can look back with a clear conscience, and that as much as we could, we came from our hearts. God bless us and direct us all. Amen.
His lawyer looked it over, and jokingly asked him, “Are there any changes you want to make in this document?”
We all laughed —sometimes through our tears – which is kind of like life.
Even in the heartache, there can come healing and hope.
If you or someone you know is looking at a separation or divorce, please remember that together we can change the face of divorce, one heart at a time.
To learn how to offer this process to your clients, please get the FREE ROADMAP and Video Introduction to Compassionate Mediation®
About Linda
As a therapist, mediator, attorney, and author, I help others avoid the pain that my family suffered. My transformational processes of Compassionate Mediation® and SELF-Led Divorce® bring peaceful resolution instead of heartbreak.
If your relationship is at a crossroad, you ‘can add passion to your marriage or compassion to your divorce with Compassionate Communication and Compassionate Mediation®. Please visit www.LindaKroll.com for your free chapter of my bestselling book, and for more free gifts and resources to help you add more peace, love and joy to your life – starting now.
You can also take my Relationship Assessment and learn how to make things better!
If you’re a heart-centered professional (therapist, mediator, attorney, coach or counselor,) you can learn how to offer these processes to your clients at www.CompassionateMediationTraining.com.
Families need not be “broken,” but can be peacefully and respectfully “re-structured.”
Last year my Love Notes were focused on the Power of Hope and the Power of Surrender. This month I’m exploring the Power of Faith, which I think is a combination of both – hope and surrender.
As I currently finish off the last of my six-month chemotherapy regimen for what (I pray) is as they say, a curable form of lymphoma, I focus on the hope I have to live a long and love-filled life, with my surrender to the outcome and the gratitude for each day.
There was one scene in (movie) where Harrison Ford, as Indiana Jones, was stuck on a precipice needing to get to the other side of a deep gully.
It looked like the only way was down, and there was no way he was going to be able to reach the other side. Instead of giving up or turning back, he carefully put out a foot to take one step, and landed on an invisible bridge to the other side.
There is something about that scene that reminds me of the Power of Faith.
What does FAITH mean to you, and where can you add more to your life?
Faith can be a belief in God, a knowingness of some deeper connection to all, a sense of Oneness, a believe in one’s own Self.
Maybe it’s about trusting that if I have the courage to take a step in the direction of my heart’s desires, then God (or the Universe or Higher Power) will be there to support me.
Faith, trust and courage. The traits that are serving me well as I undergo chemo for stage 4 lymphoma. As long as I focus on the faith that the way will be shown to me, all I have to do is I just take the step that’s in front of me, whatever that is.
Maybe it’s going for chemo, or dealing with the side effects.
Maybe it’s being with my grandchildren, and relishing every moment.
Perhaps the extra time I’m spending with friends and family is all part of the journey.
Cancer brings many gifts. You just have to know where to look.
I finally lost the 20 pounds I gained after college.
I don’t have to worry if I’m having a “good hair” day.
I realize (which I always have) how wonderful my family is.
I celebrate the connection with friends who truly care.
I enjoy everything I eat when I have the appetite.
I rejoice on pain free moments and days.
I revel in my sense of independence and self care.
I am infinitely grateful to the doctors, nurses, and medications that save lives.
But faith is what sustains me beyond the present moment.
Instead of worrying about the future, or planning my next list, goal or project, I am feeling more relaxed now than before my diagnosis.
Maybe because the reality of my own mortality, or the possibility that I may not live forever, I realize I may not really have time (no matter how much time I have) to complete all the projects I have considered, books I want to write, or courses I plan to create.
So I’m surrendering the reins of trying to control any outcome, and just showing up each day with gratitude.
That way, I follow my inspiration as to what to “do” when I feel like it, and not concerning myself on what I think I “should” be doing.
The Lord’s Prayer is what I repeated when I had scary and painful procedures to endure.
And each night I thank God for the day I have.
As George Michael sang, You Gotta Have Faith,“Cause I gotta have faith ….Mm, I gotta have faith ….. Because I’ve gotta have faith, faith, faith I gotta have faith, faith, faith”
I invite you to do the same.
What can you stop worrying about today, and instead have a little faith?
What is your definition of FAITH? And what “Leap of Faith” can you take?
I’d truly love to know and any response you make comes directly to me, and I read every word. xoxoxo
Thanks so much for signing up for the Compassionate Mediation Program. You’re going to have instant access to start the program now.
I encourage you to start at the beginning and watch the videoson whatever schedule makes sense to you to cover the basics. You’ll find that after learning the program, you’re going to have the education to feel empowered, to feel enlightened, and able to move forward with more confidence and clarity.
I’ve created this program with the best of what I’ve offered my clients for the last 25 years. This process has helped thousands of individuals and couples, and now it’s available to you.
I look forward to getting to know you better. You have forms to fill out and send to me, and there will be opportunities to work with me live.
Congratulations for taking the time to make yourself and you relationship a priority. I look forward to talking with you soon.
What Do You Truly Want?First of all, take some time to get clear on what you truly want and need. It is important to remember that a new relationship is possible, once you learn how to communicate. Divorce is often a last resort when you believe you are out of other options.You can create a better relationship with Compassionate Mediation® as you choose to add passion to your marriage — or compassion to your divorce.
How Compassionate Mediation Can Help
Compassionate Mediation® offers the tools to become educated, empowered, and enlightened to plan your future.When you have the confidence and courage to talk about an ending, you can often create a new and better beginning.Communicate about all the issues that cause conflict.
You can discuss parenting, finances, work load distribution, family commitments, and even sex. No issue is off limits. You learn to compassionately communication with empathy and kindness, no matter the outcome of your conversations.
If you are:
Unhappy but hopeful your relationship can change, help is available when you learn what to do, and what to stop doing! Unhappy but stuck, you can learn what options you have to make the changes you want, starting now.Separated, you will get the information you need to make the right decisions for your future.Thinking of or currently going through a divorce, you can respectfully and peacefully discuss all your issues.Past your divorce, you can create a better relationship with your “ex,” no matter what he or she chooses to do.
It just takes one to make a difference. Therefore, you can learn more and create the relationship you desire and deserve.
As a result of your commitment to a happier future, you can make the changes you need to have the life you will love.
