I’m so excited to announce that I am starting a certification program for therapists and coaches — and also mediators, attorneys, clergy, counselors, to help people communicate better and to resolve their differences.
Over 30 years ago, I combined my degrees in therapy, mediation, and law.
I’ve taken courses at the Chopra Center. I’m a meditation teacher, yoga teacher and Ayurveda teacher.
I combine the psychological and spiritual, the legal and financial information that I want to give to you so that you can give it to your clients, because together we can help change the face of divorce and conflict in general, one heart at a time.
And I’d love to give you the benefit of my 35 years of degrees and experience to let you take this process of Compassionate Mediation wherever you are in the world and use it to help your clients.
And if you’re a therapist or a coach, you can get up to 40 hours of continuing education credits, because my course is approved by the National Board of Certified Counselors, and it’s also approved by the International Coach Federation.
I wanted to say a word about the evaluation forms.
The National Board of Certified Counselors and the International Coach Federation both require an evaluation for CEUs.
Please fill it out however you’d like,
I’d love all your feedback about anything, the good, the bad, and in between.
If you’d like to give me an evaluation that you don’t mind my using on social media or in my sales pages for the courses, I would appreciate it very much.
I can quote you anonymously, I can quote you with a link to your website and what you do, I can quote you sometimes with a picture.
If you have a video you want to send in, I’ll use those too.
I would love your feedback for the CEU, and separately, I would love your feedback if there’s something that you want to share that might instill in other people a desire to learn the Compassionate Mediation® process.
Thank you so much for being part of my group.
It was amazing. It’s still going on, we’ll still be connected.
Please let me know if there’s anything you need from me. Talk to you soon, bye for now.
No matter what has happened in your life or relationships,
You already have everything you need to come home to your SELF.
Hi, and welcome. I am so happy you are here.
After all that has challenged us in the last year, I want to take a few minutes to help you access your highest and best Self.
Your SELF and Your “Parts”
I believe we all have a healthy SELF. When we are in SELF we are calm, clear, compassionate. Do you know those moments?
They are usually just moments. We are not always “in SELF.” We are often blended with our PARTS.
Think of your PARTS as the different voices you hear in your head.
Sometimes a Part of you wants to make one choice and you have another voice with a different thought or feeling about it.
There are three categories of PARTS
EXILES
MANAGERS
EXTREME
The EXILES are the parts we learned in childhood weren’t going to get our needs met. If we felt sad, scared, hurt, vulnerable–we didn’t want to feel that way, so we pushed those feelings aside. Some of us exiled our anger too, because it wasn’t safe to express it.
The Exiles often wonder, “What about me? Who is going to love and care for me the way I need?”
We often store the energy of the EXILE’S pain somewhere in our bodies. We don’t want to feel the emotional burdens of the EXILES, so we figure out ways to MANAGE.
We go into our heads, and with the help of our Egos, we create the PARTS of us we show the world. We can learn to be nice, pleasing, caretaking.
We can become hardworking, judgmental, blaming. Some of us manage our exiled pain and sadness by becoming angry.Many of us put on what I call a “pseudo-self” when we try to look like we’re “in SELF,” but those EXILED feelings of sadness, fear, or anger are still very present and churning.
When the energy of those EXILES threatens to upset our internal system, and our MANAGERS can no longer contain them and protect us, we have EXTREME parts that activate to numb using some way.
We choose behaviors that take the focus off our EXILE’s pain and give us moments of escape. Some people get addicted to some of those behaviors –with alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, shopping, staying busy, staying in bed, putting up internal walls, getting enraged.
When the EXTREME parts take over, we continue to ignore those EXILED parts and just focus on the EXTREME behaviors –and then the guilt and shame we have because of that behavior –but we effectively continue to ignore the feelings of our Inner Child.
There are ways to unburden that original pain. The first step in letting it go is to acknowledge that it is there. No running away or avoidance or pushing it aside.
You offer loving Compassionate Communication from your Highest SELF to those hurting parts that need and want YOUR attention.You may not have received that attention, affection, appreciation, acceptance as a child, but you can now.
Your parents or caregivers did the best they knew how to do, considering their upbringings and their level of awareness at the time.
Now you can do better.
You can give yourself the compassion, love, attention, and validation you have always wanted.
You can forgive yourself for all choices –the ones you made and the ones you avoided.
You can accept yourself for who you are now –knowing that you are doing the best you know how to do, and you can grow more from self-love and self-care than you can from self-doubt and criticism.
You can begin to COMMUNICATE more COMPASSIONATELY with yourself in every thought you think.
And you can accept and love all of your Parts,which are ALL trying to protect you in some way. They are locked in jobs they have been doing all your life.
Once you give your PARTS all the attention they need to unburden the pain from the past, they carry their own wisdom and light.
You can start to speak FOR your PARTS,rather than FROM your parts.You can rescue your Inner Child from any painful or traumatic event and remind him or her that you survived and how far you have come from that experience.
You can tap into your connection to your faith, your soul, your spirit,and remember there is an infinite source of unconditional love, acceptance, compassion and forgiveness available to you by just remembering it’s there.
When you OPEN yourself to RECEIVE that Spiritual connection of love, faith and your divine essence, you just shine that light on your Internal System of PARTS, and shower yourself with love.
As you become more compassionate and loving towards all parts of yourself, you will have more compassion and love to share with the people closest to you –and with the world.
When your Parts feel YOUR attention, affection,appreciation and acceptance, they are free to evolve.
Your Inner Critic can change to a loving Inner Coach.
Your Rage can turn into your Boundary Monitor, helping you learn how to say “no” when “no” is what you prefer, and how to leave situations that aren’t in your highest good.
Your Protective Parts can shift and change and calm and connect.
There doesn’t have to be an internal polarity because they all have a seat at the table, but YOU, coming from your Highest Self, connected to your Divine Spirit –YOU are in charge.
Over time, your Parts learn to trust You in SELF, and you feel more calm, clear, compassionate, curious, creative, connected, grateful, peaceful, joyful, and loving.
Here are some ways to get to SELF:
Roads Lead to Self: How to Attain Inner Guidance
Angels
Art
Ask for it
Body Scan
Breathe
Channeling
Children
Collage Making
Coloring
Connecting
Dance
Deep Breathing
Drawing
Dreams
Flowers
Focusing
Guided Imagery
Intuition
Journaling
Knowing Place
Labyrinth
Letting Go
Listening
Loving
Mandala
Mantra
Meditation
Miracles
Movement
Music
Nature
Nia
Painting
Parts -‐sending love
Pause
Pets
Prayer
Private Place
Running
Silence
Singing
Sleeping
Slowing Down
Solitude
Space
Sports
Stars
Surrender
Sweat Lodge
Synchronicity
Swimming
Tai Chi
Talking
Qigong
Quiet Mind and Body
Walking
Workshops
Writing
Yoga
MEDITATION
When you learn to meditate, you practice being in the silence that exists between your thoughts.
It allows you to access your true SELF, divine SELF, or spirit, and begin to make choices that align with your true purpose and joy.
You stop the attention you give to your “monkey mind”and habitual thoughts.
You learn how to be here now, love what is, and be the calm in the middle of the storm.
You learn how to look at life from a higher state of consciousness, where you are no longer reacting from a fight/flight or freeze state.
You learn how be less reactive, more responsive, intuitive and creative.
You learn that you can’t solve a problem from the level of awareness that created the problem.
You have to look at a situation from SELF, understanding your parts and others’ parts.
You can have compassion for all of them, and then make your decisions from the highest and best part of yourself, knowing in your soul that we are all spiritual beings having a human experience.
And we are all doing the best we know how to do.
Meditation allows us to have more direct access to SELF.
The more we meditate, the more SELF we can experience and share.
When there is a critical mass of SELF-present, no matter where it comes from or who is showing it, the situation can shift and become more calm and connected immediately.
If you are talking to a spouse, a child, a parent, a loved one,a co-worker, a friend, being in SELF fosters Compassionate Communication.
Being in SELF: Understand Your Parts
Meditate
Take a Breath
You can get to SELF by unburdening your parts, by practicing meditation, and by taking one breath to get to that stillness within.
TAKE ONE BREATH
For just a moment, I’d like you to notice your body. Just focus inward and scan your body from the top of your head to the soles of your feet, and just notice. Notice any tension or tightness, now notice what you are feeling or thinking. Just notice.
There may be some tightness in your jaw, shoulders, neck, stomach. You may feel some tension in your head, hands, chest. Just notice.
Now please take a breath. One conscious breath.Inhale, hold, exhale, hold. Once more. One deep breath. Inhale, hold, exhale, release.
For a few seconds you got present, tuned into your body, stopped thinking about any problem, and allowed yourself to just be here now.
You can get to SELF by:
Unburden Your Parts
Meditate
Take a Conscious Breath
Gratitude
GRATITUDE
One other way to get to SELF is to be GRATEFUL. When you are aware of your blessings, no matter what the external situation seems to be, you can come back to that awareness of all the miracles that are currently available,and compassionately communicate with yourself and the world.
One moment at a time, one person at a time, we can become the change we hope to see.
When you believe in your SELF — and stay in constant contact through understanding and loving your Parts — meditate, breathe, and be grateful, life becomes more peaceful, loving and filled with joy.
The SELF in me recognizes and cherishes the beautiful and Divine SELF that is YOU!
Namaste.
Sending you much love,
Linda
How to Love Your SELF
1. Think of all the things you’ve always wanted to do if you had time. Do one -or don’t.
2. Get in bed and vegetate. Don’t be afraid you’ll never get out again. You will
3. Rent movies.
4. Read -a magazine, poetry, a good book, anything.
5. Get a manicure, pedicure, massage -or give yourself one
.6. Plan a trip, a spa-day, a bus ride, a day off, a lunch date. (Call a travel agent to consider a vacation).
7. Give yourself permission NOT TO: bake, cook, clean, shop, or do laundry, dishes, or ironing.
8. Get used to the novelty of deciding what you want to do –and doing some of it.
9. Let go of expectations of yourself and others.
10. Change your paradigm.
11. Set aside some time to be sad, if you want to.
12.Cry.
13.Call a friend or family member.
14.Write a letter, note, poem, short story, your novel.
15.Learn to understand yourself.
16. Join Al Anon or AA.
17. Go to extra meetings.
18. Buy a present for yourself.
19. Make something special to eat — just for you.
20. Get in bed and eat chocolate.
21.Find a new hobby.
22.Play the piano.
23. Paint, color.
24. Think about classes you may want to take and look through catalogues.
25. Entertain.
26. If you do entertain, make it as easy on yourself as possible — paper plates, pot luck.
27. Exercise (walk, yoga, pilates, bike, swim, lift weights, dance!)
28. Breathe deeply, often.
29. Meditate.
30. Hire a babysitter and go out — or stay home.
31. Ask the kids to tuck you in.
32. Take your pet for a walk.
33. Go to a park and swing –or slide!
34. Take a bath.
35. Volunteer.
36.Say “no” when you don’t want to do something.
37.Journal.
38.Give yourself permission to do what you want, when you want, with whom you want.
39Connect with your Inner Child. Give him or her a hug.
40.Listen to his/her feelings to help heal. Empower him/her to have fun and to feel safe, calm, and happy.
Linda Kroll LCPC,JD Therapist, Mediator, Attorney
As a therapist, mediator and attorney, I have shared Compassionate Communication with thousands of men and women for over 20 years.
I have had the privilege of learning from Dr, Richard Schwartz, Founder of Internal Family Systems and became a Certified IFS Practitioner. I later completed five years of study with Deepak Chopra, David Simon, davidji, and the other wonderful instructors at the Chopra Center University to become a Vedic Master, a teacher of meditation, yoga and perfect health.
I have been mentored by SARK, Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy, who adds fun and play with all that she joyfully creates.
I am a Level Two Reiki Master, grateful lifelong learner, who has had the benefit of many wise teachers and guides.
Today, I am grateful to work with hundreds of women and men as they learn to treat themselves with more kindness and respect so they have more to share with others.
As I have become more SELF-led, I am calmer, clearer and more compassionate with myself and others.
I began to heal from the experiences of my past and understand and accept all parts of myself.
I feel more inner peace and happiness and would love to help you feel the same.
My hope is that you take care of your SELF so that you can communicate with honesty and empathy.
As your relationship with your SELF improves, you will feel more peace, love and joy in all your relationships.
It began when Linda, Marcia and I were doing our Reiki share in the midst of the fires on the west coast. The smoke was endangering the health of Linda and me. Marcia, in Ohio, started to feel guilty because she could breathe. What can we do? What if those who can breathe do so with intention for those who cannot? I can support you and you can support me, no matter the reason, environmental or systemic racism. Our breath becomes a life raft across time and space.
You can use a 108 bead mala to pace yourself if desired. The number 108 is sacred. It’s the number of wholeness. It’s the number six chai representing the eternal life of the soul. Read slowly and breathe with each one. Pause to hear and feel the words. Read to someone else and watch their breathing slow as you read. If you grok the idea of this practice, you can create your own I Breathe With You.
Grok – Hindu word for intuit or understand. I love this word. Sounds like a bird talking.
Who among us can breathe? Who cannot? I breathe with and for you.
I breathe with you and all your friends and family connected ones.
…with the trees outside my window.
…with the waters big and small.
…with the wind.
…and smoke.
…with the fires
…and ash.
…and rain.
…with the fog.
…and the spiders who want to be inside.
…and the roly-poly bugs inching across the floor.
…with the rocks, big and small.
…with the sea lions barking at the bottom of the hill.
…with the screaming birds.
…seagulls.
… crows.
…eagles.
I breathe with the mighty hummingbird and her electric sound.
I breathe with the dahlias and the crocosmias.
…the geraniums and the mint.
…the milkweed and the marigolds.
I breathe with the wood of the house, strong and sturdy.
…with the windows and their vision.
I breathe with the mold hidden and not.
I breathe with the idea of balance.
I breathe with knowing I am not the center of the universe.
I breathe with my part in the world.
…with the joy in me.
…with the joy in you.
…with our separation.
…our connection.
Our suffering.
Our end of the cause of suffering.
Our letting go.
Our opening up.
Our open hearts.
Our minds, free and clear.
With my pain.
With your pain.
I breathe with being free of pain..
With the life force.
To be present.
To be soft and yielding.
To stand firmly in my groundedness.
I breathe with the skies.
I breathe with all the colors we see.
Red.
Orange.
Yellow.
Green.
Blue.
Purple
Black.
Brown
White
I breathe with the earth’s core:
fiery and expanding.
…and the earth’s crust:
brittle or crumbling,
fertile and verdant.
I breathe into all the elements.
Fire.
Air.
Metal.
Space.
Wood.
Earth.
I breathe with “being in relationship.”
I breathe with “ what is my portion.”
…”what do I need going forward?”
I breathe with the body.
…with the voice:
say my name, say all the names.
I breathe with the liver, toxin filter.
…the spleen and lymph, first line of defense.
..the blood, oxygen distributor.
..the bones, structure, shape and scaffolding.
..inner marrow, stem cell producer.
..lungs, wings of the heart.
I breathe with the sounds around and in me.
I breathe with the smells swirling in, out.
I breathe with my hands and their touch to this body.
I breathe with the sensations on my skin.
…the borders of my body.
…beyond the borders.
…with the heavenly host.
…with the moonlight.
…with the sun’s radiance.
…the stars.
…the night.
…the day.
…into this life right now.
…into the lives before this one.
and after.
…with the hands cupped to cradle our nation with all protection buddha mudra.
…with riding out the storm with calm.
I breathe with the power of love.
I breathe with giving love.
I breathe with receiving love.
I breathe with there is no difference in giving and receiving love.
I breathe with there is no OTHER when we breathe with our connection.
I breathe with all the forces of nature giving life to this planet.
May we breathe respect.
May we breathe balance through listening.
I breathe with hearing you and you hearing me.
I breathe with the name of god in the silence of my breath’s exhalation.
I invite you to join with me and share the free gifts and the two programs that I’m offering now.
With all that’s going on in the world — with all the difficulties in communication and all the strained and stressed relationships — I have two programs to be of help.
The first one is called the Compassionate Mediation® Program.
It’s for individuals and couples to either add passion to their marriage or compassion to their divorce. I’d love for you to help me spread the word about that.
If you’re interested, I give you a FREE Relationship Assessment that you can tell people about.
And then if anyone takes the Relationship Assessment and later takes my course on Compassionate Mediation Program, you’ll get 30% of the cost of the course as my way of saying thank you.
The Compassionate Mediation Program, based on my book, is for individuals and couples who could use the help now.
It’s a six hour program. It’s evergreen which means it’s always available.
And if you’re interested, I’ll send you copy that you can use to put on social media, to send out in an email, with a link with your name. And if someone that you send it to eventually buys the program, I’d love to thank you with a percentage of what the program costs.
So that’s the Compassionate Mediation Program for individuals and couples.
The other program I’d love for you to share for me is my Compassionate Mediation® Training.
It is called Compassionate Mediation Tools For Your Practice Now. I send you a FREE ROADMAP and VIDEO that you can offer to a professional — a therapist, mediator, attorney, coach, clergy, counselor — someone who works with individuals and couples who could use this skill set.
And after they look at the free road map and the video, if they take my training, Compassionate Mediation Tools For Your Practice Now, you get 30% of that course.
And then eventually this fall, I’m going to be having the certification for professionals.
What I’m asking for now is for you to find out more about the relationship assessment that leads to the Compassionate Mediation Program and about the road map and video that lead to the Compassionate Mediation Training.
It’s my fervent hope that we can reach as many people as possible with a message of SELF- leadership. And what I mean by self leadership — considering Dick Schwartz’ work with Internal Family Systems — is when we come from our highest SELF, we are calm, clear, compassionate, courageous, confident, connected, caring. We need more SELF presence right now.
I want to help the individuals and couples to create the relationships they desire and deserve.
And I want to help the professionals reach as many people as possible with this process so that together, we can change the face of divorce and conflict in general, one heart at a time.
Communication can be difficult in the best of times, but no one has had a roadmap on how best to help clients in conflict.
Couples and families can use all the assistance we can give them and acquiring these “unique tools” for your therapeutic toolkit can help them – and you.
I am excited to share a transformational (IFS-based) training for relationship healing – Compassionate Mediation® – offering you techniques and materials you can use either in-person or online.
In his review of her book, Dick Schwartz said, “This is relationship healing at its best… Linda Kroll is a master at lifting couples out of their narrow perspectives…”
Compassionate Mediation® helps any relationship that needs healing – even if only one member of a couple learns these skills.
You will gain expertise to help people heal themselves and their relationships.
Warmly,
ABOUT LINDA KROLL, LCPC, JD
Linda Kroll, an IFS therapist, mediator, attorney, and Chopra-Certified teacher of meditation, yoga, and Ayurveda has created a program that covers emotional and spiritual healing along with financial and legal information and support.
Linda believes, “Families need not be broken, but can be peacefully and respectfully restructured.”
Now, more than ever – Linda’s process of SELF-led compassionate communication will help resolve conflict, heal old wounds, and foster relationship transformation.
Linda is the author of an award-winning book Compassionate Mediation® for Relationships at a Crossroads: How to Add Passion to Your Marriage or Compassion to Your Divorce and the Kindle book, “Compassionate Divorce™: Changing the Face of Divorce, One Heart at a Time. She is the Founder of the online Compassionate Communication Academy, where her six-hour online video series – Compassionate Mediation® Program – is available to help couples and individuals around the world.
Other IFS therapists who have participated in Linda’s trainings have said:
“Wow!! I love watching a therapist so competent in couples work! I will begin and merge concepts with my practice – especially with couples on the brink.”
“Thanks so much. This gives me a roadmap and framework for helping couples navigate their decision making in a way that honors and empowers both parties.
(Optional Note) I do not administer this course. I am an affiliate and support many of the products created. This means, if you choose to make a purchase, I will make a small commission.
Linda Kroll, an IFS therapist, mediator, attorney, and Chopra-Certified teacher of meditation, yoga, and Ayurveda has created a program that covers emotional and spiritual healing along with financial and legal information and support.
