Is Compassionate Mediation® the same as marriage counseling? No, it is more.
At this time of relationship challenges, individuals and couples will be seeking therapy more than ever.
In marriage counseling, both parties may seem to be committed to staying in the marriage. However, often one or both may have a secret thought of a separation or divorce that they may not share with their partner. This secret agenda covertly affects the way they are able to participate in the counseling since the discussion about what a separation or divorce would look like is never discussed.
Compassionate Mediation® is a process to help individuals or couples who are ambivalent about their future. The conversations help them to decide whether to divorce or create a new marriage based on who each party is now and what they each want and need from this time forward.
The tools of Compassionate Mediation® give you and your clients information about all of their options, including a separation, legal separation, or a divorce.
With full knowledge of their potential rights, responsibilities, gains and losses, your clients might renew their desire to truly heal their current relationship and make positive actions in the direction of meeting both partners’ needs.
If divorce is ultimately their final outcome, they can embark on the process with much more confidence, clarity and calm, and be able to create a SELF-led Divorce®, using the principles of SELF-leadership from IFS training. Each party can be more compassionate and courageous and help the relationship heal, as it transforms.
Is Compassionate Mediation® the same as traditional divorce mediation? It is more.
Compassionate Mediation® does not always lead to a divorce. Many times it fosters SELF-led communication to explore whether a new relationship together is still possible as your clients practice Compassionate Communication. At the same time, they will discuss all their rights and responsibilities to feel fully informed and empowered.
In discussing what a “new marriage” would be, they also have an opportunity to create new patterns for all of their needs – financial, parental, familial, and even sexual.
What can I hope to accomplish with Compassionate Mediation®?
Compassionate Mediation® gives both individuals and couples a chance to feel heard, understood and validated no matter what final outcome is chosen. You provide information, guidance and support as they consider all options – individually and as a couple.
Often, many of the decisions that would be addressed in a divorce mediation are covered in this process: money, parenting, roles and responsibilities, and any other issues that are causing hurt or dissension.
This way, the individual or couple can begin to recognize what each party has contributed to the current situation and what can be done to make it better — including getting a job, helping more with the children, or finally knowing how to listen and empathize with their partner’s feelings.
If separation or divorce becomes their decision, each party will have acquired the tools necessary to move forward with more honesty, integrity and respect. The transition to a SELF-led Divorce® becomes a healing opportunity rather than a typical adversarial process.
What does the Compassionate Mediation® process include?
In the first session, clients learn a new way to communicate and begin to talk about all the issues that have created distance or conflict. They can also later consider what their rights and responsibilities would be if they wanted to create a new marriage, separate, file for a legal separation, or pursue a divorce.
In each session, there is time for individual conversations and time to meet as a couple. With empathy, honesty and compassion, the facts and feelings are addressed and all possibilities considered.
Individually and together, both parties are encouraged to consider how their actions and choices have contributed to the current situation.
With no fault or blame, they are free to co-create new solutions with higher consciousness and more SELF-leadership.
When each party is in “SELF”, they are more compassionate, clear, confident, courageous, and connected to your inner wisdom and deeper knowing.
Whether they stay together (and create a new and better relationship) or get divorced, what they learn from Compassionate Mediation® will enhance all their current relationships and give them more awareness in future relationships.
Your individual or couples clients can decide to create a new marriage, separate without any legal papers, decide on a legal separation or work together to dissolve their union with a SELF-led Divorce®.
Whatever their ultimate decision, healing can happen and peace can be restored.
Love is the answer – and it starts with loving your SELF.
How Can Compassionate Mediation® Improve My Practice?
- Whether your clients want to improve their relationship, feel stuck, plan to separate, are going through – or even past – a divorce, you’ll be equipped with a proven step-by-step method to help individuals and couples to resolve conflict in their relationships
- You’ll add an expertise to your practice that will help you stand out as a specialist in your community and even online.
- You’ll discover new ways to help your clients practice compassionate communication to relate to their best SELF, let go of limiting beliefs, unburden pain from the past, and relate from their hearts.
- You’ll gain confidence in your ability to coach your clients navigate life-changing decisions
- You’ll get the tools and techniques to calmly and confidently be a treasured resource to your clients for months and even years.
- You'll be part of a healing community of transformational healers offering this process all over the world.
You can receive Continuing Education Credits for therapists and coaches by the NBCC (National Board of Certified Counselors) and
ICF (International Coach Federation)
in my Compassionate Mediation Certification.
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to see if this is a fit for you now.
I'd love to share my 35 years of experience with you.