Compassionate Communication in Compassionate Mediation®

Compassionate Mediation® starts with Compassionate Communication

If you are having conflict in your relationship, Compassionate Mediation® will help. You will learn how to connect to your highest and best SELF and resolve your issues with empathy and respect..

Compassionate Mediation®  starts with Compassionate Communication as you learn how to create a new beginning in the highest good for all concerned.

Please join me on my upcoming FREE WEBINAR: "Should I Stay or Should I Go?" — Five Vital Questions to Help You Know

Compassionate Communication

Compassionate Communication allows you to connect to your highest and best SELF, let go of limiting beliefs and judgments, unburden pain from the past, and relate from your heart.

Connect to your best SELF

When we are “in SELF,” we're calm, clear, and compassionate. We are connected to the best version of who we are. We are confident, courageous, and connected peacefull and respectfully.

We're usually not “in SELF.”

We're in our Parts - Parts of us that are angry, scared, hurt, walled, defensive, aggressive., We either EXILE some parts and push them aside and don't tell our partner that we're really sad and scared, and instead we try to MANAGE by being nice or pleasing or being stoic or being hardworking or pretending we're "in SELF."  We pretend everything is okay, but we're really feeling a lot of these hurt, sad, scared, maybe even angry feelings that we're not sharing.

So instead we do EXTREME things to numb ourselves. We stay real busy. We get addicted to things - alcohol, drugs, even shopping or exercise. We  may even go have an affair. We get depressed. We get enraged. We do a lot of different things to cope with the painful, scary situation that conflict causes.

When we're "in SELF,"  we are less reactive and can be more responsive.  We can be aware of what we are feeling and we can be compassionate with ourselves, and then offer that compassion to our partner.

Four Ways to Get to SELF

There are four ways to get to self. The first way is to just take a breath because all our Parts can cause us to be very anxious.  All those voices in our head: "Do I want to stay? Do I want to go? What do I want to do? How do I want to be? Can I put my wall down? Is it safe? How am I going to look at him or her through the filter?"

  1. We take a breath. We come to the present moment, and we're not regurgitating the past to what they did to us then, and we're not projecting that into the future as if it's going to be that way forever, but we're present. In that present moment, there's a lot more possibility.
     
  2. Speak for our parts not from our parts
. The second way to get to SELF is to recognize that we have these Parts and we speak for them, but not from them. It's okay to say from your higher SELF, "There's a part of me that's angry because of something. There's a part of me that's scared when you do that. I'm feeling sad because.” When we're talking from SELF, it's a whole different dialogue.
     
  3. Let go of limiting beliefs
. When you are compassionately communicating, you are relating from self. You're letting go of your limiting beliefs and judgments about the other person. You are unburdening the pain from the past, not carrying it with you and projecting it into the future.
     
  4. Relate from your heart
. When you're in your higher SELF, it's safe to open your heart. It may mean you'll be setting more boundaries. It may mean that you choose to leave, but you can do it from your higher SELF.

Once you learn Compassionate Communication, you can heal and transform your relationship from your highest and best SELF. Even if you are the only one in your relationship who learns this skill, miracles can happen. You create a new energy that invites more partnership and  love. Try it, you'll see.

You can learn more on my upcoming FREE WEBINAR: "Should I Stay or Should I Go?" — Five Vital Questions to Help You Know.

I hope to see you there.