Compassionate Relationships

Compassionate Relationships in Compassionate Mediation

(Show empathy to your partner, which will benefit you both).

Whether you decide to stay in your relationship or leave it, you have choices to make on how you are going to relate to your partner. No matter what you're choosing to do, you have to get to a place of compassion. You have to get to a place where you can really relate to each other with respect, with kindness, with empathy.

The Miracle of Empathy helps you to compassionately listen to what's underneath the anger that your partner might be showing you. You understand the hurt and the fear and the sadness, and you open your heart to empathize — even if you've done it many times before. Because as you give empathy, it enriches you no matter what your other person is going to do.

Compassionate Mediation® is helpful even if you are are the only one who learns it. I have shared this process with an individual who's come to my office confused. I've shared it with couples that one wants to stay and the other one wants to go. That happens a lot of times. Then I've used it in mediation for divorce as well.

The Steps of Compassionate Mediation

  • The first step, again, come home to yourself. Take care of yourself.

  • The second step: create a compassionate relationship.

Practice the miracle of empathy, where you start talking about what you want with “I” messages instead of talking about your judgments with “you” messages.

And being able to talk with empathy means you have to have 
the Five Steps to Receive What You Want and Need.

Those five steps are:

you have to know what you want and need. You have to know you deserve it. You have to be willing to ask for it and ready to receive it and stay grateful.

  1. know what you want.
  2. 
Know you deserve it.
  3. 
Learn how to ask.
  4. 
Be willing to receive and 

  5. Stay grateful.

The 5 Steps are a process because many times we're in a relationship and we spend our whole relationship taking care of other people. So we've lost sight of what we want and need.

Fill up with SELF love.

Go back to that first step and find out what makes you YOU, what makes you happy, and do that. Fill up with self-love. Then you'll be more loving.

You'll take those 5 Steps and you'll begin to think about what it is you want and sharing that with your partner instead of what you don't want.